Brief Catch up and Inspiration

Finally sharing why I’ve been MIA for 6 months (pretty obvious right – as my website looks dated af). Well the secrets out… I am pregnant. I will be 8 months pregnant in a little over a week (which can be a whole other story considering my due date keeps getting moved around so much). I have been trying to pull everything together that we would need in order to become awesome parents.

A few girls reached out recently and asked if I would do a post about winter fashion wear. Now, I will start off by saying, I by no means am a stylist nor do I think I hold any fashion sense whatsoever, but thank you for thinking of me.

Growing up in Southern California, I had never “really” experienced seasons (except for the occasional trips my family would take us to all over the states). Now that I have lived abroad for close to 6 years, I can honestly say fall is one of my favorite seasons! The leaves changing colors, the hot beverages, the warm scented candles (Yankee to be exact, y’all know my strong addiction for the YankeeCo.), as well as the clothing aka over the knee boots and oversized sweaters (never leaving my leather jackets behind).

I tried to find a few photos that inspired me for the upcoming seasons (Fall and Winter) and listed them below. Hopefully they help inspire you!

 

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2017!! Happy New Year!!

Wishing everyone a safe and Happy New Year!! I have a feeling 2017 is going to be an amazing year!

Common Mistakes Women Make Leading to Rejection

We have all seen the movie He’s Just Not That Into You… they nailed it when it comes to women’s reactions and emotions as we dance around the dating scene. We get together with our girlfriends and gossip about what he said/she said. Adding up all the details and coming up with the conclusion that this man (or woman) you are dating has completely fallen head over heals for you.

I have girlfriends that never been single, I have girlfriends that are single by choice, some that date around, others that want to marry for money, and some that are constantly rejecting men while others find the dating scene a nightmare and can’t keep a man around for a second date. I mean it’s a wide spectrum.

Many women struggle with rejection on a frequent base (or some men just simply lose interest) – there is nothing wrong with this, however if any of these scenarios sound like something you are regularly experiencing… keep reading!

Common Mistakes Women Make Leading to Rejection:

  1. It takes time but you need to get out there. If you have been rejected a lot then you’ve probably developed a fear of rejection – which can lead to avoiding the dating scene all together. Don’t give up. I listen to many podcasts… one girl specifically made the decision to say “yes” to things as opposed to “no” leading her to some amazing adventures. Let me just say, “Mr.Right” isn’t going to surprisingly knock on your front door and sweep you off your feet.
  1. Just because you have been rejected, doesn’t mean your undesirable. Let rejection go. If you hold on to the mentality of always being rejected then you will not even be able to give yourself the opportunity to move forward.
  1. Be positive when it comes to dating. Maybe you were dumped, cheated on, stood up, or told you weren’t good enough but you cannot let this define you. You have to be positive in order to attract positivity.
  1. You have low self-esteem. Being rejected can create a low self-esteem, HOWEVER maybe you are being rejected because of your low self-esteem. No one wants to date someone that carries around insecurities and people definitely don’t want to hear you complain about them constantly. You have to love yourself before anyone else can love you. Men are drawn to women that are confident (not overly). Learn to love yourself and build your confidence!
  1. Don’t be a Stage 5 Clinger. One of my girlfriends is absolutely gorgeous and an honest catch, unfortunately she struggles with moving too fast (no not in sac). One date, and she is texting him non-stop… it’s like she falls in love instantly and that alone can make a man panic and run. Try not to come off too needy. Let him reach out to you. Let him want you. The harder you play to get – the harder they will try. And do NOT, I repeat do not, have sex right away. Get to know the person. (When I was younger my father would make me listen to Tom Leykis and told me all men think like him). This for sure taught me how men think (not all men but many). Check out his podcast to get a better idea.
  1. Coming off too independent. Some women want a man but never give themselves the opportunity to jump into the dating scene because they are too busy with other things (aka work and life). There is nothing wrong with this, but don’t let it interfere with meeting someone… and when you’re on a date, try not bringing up how i.n.d.e.p.e.n.d.e.n.t. you are and not needing a man to make you happy. That gets old real quick. Let him treat you. Shivery is not dead.
  1. Have an appetite. No one wants to go on dates with another person who doesn’t eat. That can be extremely uncomfortable. Trust me on this. You don’t have to drink (booze that is) but you have to eat.
  1. Interested in someone who is not interested? Don’t force something. If he is not interested than he is simply not interested. Move along. Don’t let this affect you.
  1. Maybe he is not over his ex? Maybe he just got out of a relationship and isn’t looking to jump back into another one so quickly… Maybe you should think twice about dating this person! (Oh and ladies if he is married and reaching out – save yourself from a future rejection).
  1. Know Your Value. Simple as that.
  1. Don’t come across too masculine. Guys enjoy girls that aren’t afraid to get dirty and play sports BUT don’t take that to another level and start talking like buddies. You can be buds but don’t go overboard or else you will find yourself stuck in the friend zone.
  1. You can change a man’s wardrobe but you cannot change him. Once you start pushing too hard, he is going to be running for the door leading to rejection. The right guy will come along just be patient.
  1. Don’t forget to appreciate the little things. Men try (not all men – don’t get it twisted) so when they do something nice for you be grateful. If not, your lack of appreciation can get old.
  1. Don’t be drama. Avoid drama. Who wants to date someone full of drama?! At some point, you have to take a look in the mirror.
  1. Have a little faith. If you question his trust all the time, and he has never done anything untrustworthy than he is going to get sick and tired of trying to explain himself. Checking his phone and constantly questioning him is only going to lead to rejection if he has never done anything wrong. It can bring out insecurities. In which case refer to #4. (ps if you have to question a guy about his honesty, is that someone you really want to be with? Save yourself the headache).
  1. Don’t try to tie him down to quickly. If you have only been on a few dates (like two) and you haven’t talked about being exclusive however you are telling everyone you are boyfriend/girlfriend – you come off as a stage 5… see #5.

 

Good Luck in the dating scene!

Babe-Report

 

Dry Shampoo … Duh

I mean seriously, do I really need to continue… Dry shampoo is such a life saver.  Honestly, it is one of the first purchases I make when get settled into our new homes abroad.  No one likes washing their hair everyday (unless you do, then clearly your better person than me). I have specific favorites for specific reasons.  I’m also not fond of anything that makes the texture of my hair feel dry.  I still need to be able to run my fingers through my locks and have a fresh scent.

A couple of my favorites, in order:

  • Batiste Dry Shampoo (Drugstore, Cheap, and Efficient)
  • Living Proof Perfect Hair Day (Thanks Jen Aniston and your dreamy hair)
  • Pantene Dry Shampoo (Similar to Batiste, Easy to Find, Cheap, and Smells Amaze)
  • Nexxus Youth Renewal Rejuvenating Dry Shampoo (Who doesn’t like Nexxus)
  • John Frieda Luxurious Volume Refresher (Thanks Target)

Truth be told, I always buy the Big Sexy Hair Volumizing Dry Shampoo in hopes that I will love it and every year (literally, every year) I waste my money ($20) and remember why I hate it so much – dries my scalp out like crazy!

“The Higher the Hair the Closer to God”

 

 

Yes or No????

Lately I have been sooo into Podcasts. I find myself reaching for the remote control less often and gravitating more towards my iPad. When you are living abroad, it becomes difficult to keep up with the news events and, of course, daily celebrity news.

Having a degree in Communications with an Emphasis in Media and Tourism along with a few minors, I’ve decided to put my major to the test. Writing is by far my favorite thing to do, but I feel like you really have to know my personality in order to understand my sarcasm and blog pieces. I never take things in life too seriously. My family has been through some health scares and that has helped me realize that life can be short and it is important to embrace adventure.

Every time I think about radio, I will never forget a producer, I once worked for at ABC Sports, saying “he had a face for radio”, therefore he decided to stay behind the scenes. Hilarious. The line stuck with me.

Considering a Podcast? A girlfriend of mine (crazy how we met and how fast we became such close friends – I literally talk to her everyday and legit get concerned for her life if I haven’t heard from her longer than a day) and I are debating on this whole Podcast idea. We both are extremely outgoing and are VERY opinionated. Sarcastic – duh. We can agree to disagree on certain things but that’s what we enjoy most. We are brutally honest and have respect for each other. You always need a girl friend in your life like this – she wont tell you what you want to hear but what you need to hear.

The debate is up… Should we or shouldn’t we? The topics will be broad. Discussing anything from television shows, celebrities, personalities, every day life struggles, being a mom, not being a mom, dating problems, marriage issues, happily ever after vs reality, living abroad, must go vacations… featuring guests. The list goes on but maybe you are starting to get the idea.

Couple Podcasts I am currently enjoying:

  • Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald      (by far my favorite)
  • Brandi Glanville Unfiltered       (She is so drama and I love her drama)
  • Straight Up with Stassi  (pretty annoying she only talks about herself but I still listen)
  • Serial         (for obvious reasons, Season 1 is the tits)
  • Secrets, Crimes, and Audiotape          (not completely sold on this one yet)
  • Anna Faris is Unqualified                (subscribed but yet to listen to one pod)
  • Bitch Sesh       (hilarious)
  • Embedded       (News Stories revisited/elaborated on)
  • Invisibilia        (Psychology and Human behavior)
  • The Young Turks       (Politics)

Break Ups, Make Ups, and Finding YOU

I’m sitting here, enjoying a glass of Cab Sav, and struggling with writer’s block.

I want to talk about shit that happens in our life that we may not understand right now, but eventually makes us stronger.

Let’s be honest, we have all been through a break up and sometimes find ourselves struggling to understand why things didn’t work out. The grieving process of getting over a man will open you up and force you into deep vulnerability.

Breakups suck. They can leave you in shock. This vision of the future, you have created, has been shattered. All the plans and expectations you once had no longer exist anymore. Your best friend has quickly become a stranger that you have zero communication with. We all Instagram stalk, but you’ve been completely shut out and “blocked” from viewing this person’s social media aspect that you once shared your life together on. Dick move, but that’s what usually happens after a break up unless you beat him to the punch (which sounds childish but hey your lying to yourself if you’ve never done it before).

Maybe this breakup will force you to become in touch with your own needs. Being too focused on your man (at the time; now ex) can create the perfect distraction leaving you in denial about your relationship.

What is important to me?

Will I be alone forever?

Who am I outside of this relationship?

How do I suddenly stop loving him? (Is this possible? Was he my person?)

Was I blindsided or did I just not pay attention to the issues we had?

How can I fulfill my own desires and potential?

Is there anything in my life that I have been putting on hold?

What is best for me… now?

You are forced to examine where you have been applying a Band Aid and covering up some issues. My mother has always told me to never let a man see or break you down, you deserve better, and ice cream can mend a broken heart.

It is important to talk to people. Maybe you pushed friends away for your relationship. Try rekindling those friendships. True friends are able to pick up where they left off by having a single conversation. Ask for advice. Lean on your family and friends.

Enjoy your alone time. You won’t be alone forever. Discover new interests. Have dinner alone.

Reclaim your uniqueness. You are who you are. After a break up, you don’t necessarily need to “change yourself”… lets be real, self-help books and affirmations are bullshit. You already are yourself. You can change, but change in a way that you may be adding and subtracting from yourself not starting from complete scratch.

Treat yourself.

Try a “change of scenery”.

Keep on living. Live life normally, but try new things. We are all going to experience good days and bad days but understand that there are always people in the world battling difficult things. Don’t let this break up get the best of you. Don’t allow anyone to stop you from living your life to the fullest.

Keep yourself busy. Go out and have a social life (just make sure not to rush new relationships – you need to focus on yourself for a while).

Don’t let this relationship squash your self-esteem. Have zero regrets. You will grow from each relationship you have. Use this past relationship to form a confidant you.

I know from personal experience, you have to let something go in order to realize how much it means to you (it may come back). This ex of yours may realize they’ve lost something (or someone) that has played such a huge role in their life and possibly want you back. Maybe the time apart has altered what you both want and you guys are ready to start with a clean plate.

But…. if he doesn’t come to his senses, then fuck him – you have just discovered a whole new you. His loss is another man’s gain!

Finger

Cheers!

Babe-Report

The Dirty Truth About… Birth Control

Last month, I (we) made a decision to get off birth control. Truth is, nobody really tells you what happens to your body when you make the drastic decision to get off the pill.

After so many years of inconvenient trips to the pharmacy and prescriptions written from the only other man that gets up in there, besides your husband or for those of you that are Birth Control
single and in an exclusive relationship, you have decided to turn off that 9:55am alarm reminding you to pop that bad boy into your mouth. You think, “What a relief, hey?” no more trying to remember if you took your pill or not.

Let’s just say you are in for a whole new treat while your body is trying to get rid of that little monster you have been on for 9 years.

9 years is a long time!! I mean throwback to the time you turned 18 and had your period for the first time (or when ever you got your period… clearly I was a late bloomer but I blame Pop BCthat on being an athlete). Literally, I can’t even remember what it was like to be irregular anymore. My doctor explained to me the answer to an irregular period, acne, and being
really tiny was —- Birth Control (BC).

Playing on Club soccer teams and a travel team, it only seemed natural that BC would be the best solution while rocking those white Nike shorts on the field. I opted for Ortho Tri Cycline Lo. A low dosage based on my weight. Man O Man, as soon as the pill was in my system I started to grow those boobs I never thought I would have and wanted so badly. I quickly came to the conclusion BC pills were my friends.

Fast forward to 9 years later, and I am going hormone free. It is weird not carrying around a pack of pills and turning off that alarm … weird in a good way. I don’t even know who I am without the pills. My first thought is to Google “what to expect when getting off birth control.” I Google everything. I am the type of person that self diagnoses myself (thank you webMD). To save you some time, you get a bunch of mixed results; both positive and negative but every woman’s body is so different.

For the most part, the first couple weeks were uneventful. Dropped about 7 pounds of water weight (tits are still with me though so that’s a plus) and my libido is like HELLO. I feel like I am thinking clearly now (if that makes any sense). Sounds awesome right?! My period came around the same time as usual and lasted 4 days (no spotting in between, which I heard is extremely common). I thought to myself, “I guess the pill didn’t change my body too much.”

I was wrong about that.

Here I am experiencing my first REAL month of being off the pill. Acne. What a bitch! I have never in my life experienced acne like I am now. Not only is the acne irritating me but also the fact that my eczema is back and in full force. The acne on my chin isn’t the worst of it — It’s the acne and eczema on my back and (believe it or not) my chest… What the Stress BChell is this? I immediately hit up my buddy Google. Go figure, I am not the only woman in this world experiencing this madness. I would like to give you some more positive news, like my personality is fabulous (even though I believe I am always in a good mood on or off the pill — my husband seems to disagree) BUT the negatives have outweighed the positive (for me) so far.

It has been an adjustment but I am working through this stage of my life and I know it can only go up from here. I am interested to discover how my body functions and continues to change now that I am completely off the pill. For now, birth control and I are no longer friends due to all the shit he is putting me through. I’m guessing motherhood will be a whole new blog post once we have children. Stay tuned.

On the plus side, for those of you ladies still on the pill – how cool is it that some insurance companies are no longer making you pay an arm and a leg for birth control because the Affordable Care Act was passed. In the meantime, enjoy your little friend birth control while you are still taking him… when you decide to part ways, you may come to realize the little bitch may not be so loyal after all. In the future, I am looking forward to a birth control for men hitting the market. Good luck ladies!

– The Babe Report